Lost Dog!

This blog posting is a waver about my lost puppy. I lost him just two days ago outside of Dan & Whit’s. He has large, black claws, three rows of teeth (very sharp), and red eyes. He is quick to anger, and knows no emotion other than hate, anger, and disgust. He is often unreasonable and lacks the restraint of other dogs (and most other animals for that matter). He was wearing a red collar with his license and a pentagram shaped pendant on it. He likes to stand on his hind legs so he can look people in the eyes. If you find him, make sure he doesn’t bite you. If he bites someone, and they escape, he likes to come find them (usually on the one year anniversary of the bite) and finish the job. When he stands on his hind legs and looks you in the eyes as described earlier, be careful. He expects people to maintain eye contact; if one looks away for even a second, he might have a kind of a breakdown, like he did with my cousin Richard, poor guy. In the day he will probably be pretty easy to spot, since his fur lights on fire if it ever comes in contact with sunlight. In the night he stays in the shadows, but he can still be seen pretty easily because of his eyes, which glow red in the presence of a sinner. He answers only to the name Zxhecthalexial, Bringer of Darkness, and if you say his name six times, something happens to his eyes, and he grows these weird bat-like wings.
If you find a dog that matches that description give me a call!
-Peter