Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Flutterby

Flutterby


The butterfly winked at me, the eyes on its wings flashing brightly in the few sunbeams that made it through the canopy above. Around me birch trees grew in a strangely purposeful grid, giving the effect of walking down ephemeral corridors as I moved amongst them. It was a place that I had seen many times off of the road and had always meant to visit, but had never gotten around to it until now. The glade was shady and covered in soft green moss, although with a definite lack of wildflowers (which is why I was surprised to find a butterfly there). While I wandered about the butterfly hovered in a sort of expectant air, always staying in sight. The twinkle of its wings suddenly drew my attention away from the trees, prompting me to properly inspect it as it fluttered about. It was unlike any flutterby I had ever seen: its wings were a deep black that seemed to shift between earthy hues of rich dirt, red clay, and mossy loam. The eye designs on the wings, by comparison, were a piercing blue which somehow managed to catch the light of the scarce sunbeams just right.
Now the butterfly flitted past and behind me, hurrying now to some destination. Not wanting to see it go, I followed blithely along. When it floated into thicker brush I hesitated, but continued on, figuring that I might as well explore a bit. I picked my way through the thickets and overhanging trees, stumbling and snapping fallen limbs in my passing. Soon though, I broke through into a clearing. Squinting from the intense light, I paused to take in the idyllic scene. Long yellowed grass with a smattering of goldenrod swayed in the breeze, while a small stream cut through the glade, crystal water tumbling over round-washed stones. I saw that my butterfly had joined more of its kin to flit amongst the grass, tasting of the wildflowers. How extraordinary, to find not one but many of these beautiful creatures. But wait, I couldn’t pick out my butterfly from the rest. As if sensing this ripple of uncertainty in my otherwise cheerful thoughts, the butterflys scattered, each speeding in a different direction. Panicked, I froze in place. It seemed terribly important that I follow my butterfly, the one that had brought me to this place. I felt that the others would lead me down insidious ways, to the darkest vales of the wildwood. Then out of the corner of my eye, a bright blue flash, and I turned to see my flutterby winking at me through the trees, offering me safe passage. Sprinting, I broke back through into the shadows of the forest.
Tumbling through the brush, I kept the winking eyes just in sight. The flutterby was too fast, I couldn’t keep up. The forest got in my way, branches whipping at me, hidden roots. My foot caught. I tripped. The trees parted, revealing a steep embankment, but I couldn’t stop, my momentum carried me forward and off the cliff. Rolling down through the dust, earth and sky blending in my muddled vision, nothing broke my fall until a peculiarly soft thud halted me.
I had landed on emerald moss, soft and springy. I bounced off of it onto sturdier ground, dusted myself off and only then finally looked around me. Here the woods were darker, great trees twisted up from the earth to blot out the sun, allowing only the rare ray of sunlight through their gnarled boughs. The green moss crept everywhere, whilst spotted toadstools peeked up from beneath the roots and plate fungi spiraled in staircases up the trunks of tree. And there were the ruins. The buildings had fallen, great walls torn down by the passage of time, with only the foundation stones still standing firm. But the statues still stood. Great monoliths of granite, looking as if they were cut from a single slab. Breath taken, I walked gingerly amongst them, while their many faces peered down at me in mourning, jubilation, rage, and submission. Sadly, they too had been touched by time: the creeping moss covered much of their bases, and roots silently worked their way into the stone, widening the cracks. I felt awed, and somewhat excited: this place was beautiful and secret, and I was here! There were no signs of frequent visitors; I might even be the first to find this place since its makers departed. But wait, why did they leave? So much effort had been poured into this place; it must have been of enormous significance to its builders. Why would anyone leave this behind? While I stood there, thinking my perturbed thoughts, a shimmer caught my eye. My butterfly! I had scarcely noticed its absence. Now it came rushing to me, beating against me with its small wings, hurrying me from the way it had come. My curiosity piqued, I glanced down the row of statues to what lay beyond. It was dark. While the twilight of the ruins gave them a somber air, this darkness was menacing; something more than just the shade of the trees.
The air and earth rumbled, as if a great horn was sounding just out of my hearing range. From the dark came a gust of wind which seemed to break around the flutterby, but what was left of its power still lifted and slammed me against a tree. Heaving myself up, I saw the butterfly lying broken in the moss. Hesitating just enough to cradle my guide in my hands, I rushed away from the ruins. The next blast was diluted by distance, but regardless hurled me up the hill. Sprawled at the top, I collected myself and darted into the trees. The third wave of air attacked, but was broken by the forest, with only breezy tendrils clutching at my clothes. Panicked, not know where I went, dodging limbs as they zipped past, I just ran. Seeing a light to my right, I veered towards it, flitting through the trees.
I burst through the trees, suddenly disoriented. I was back where I began, in the corridors of birch trees. I collapsed, my head reeling with it all. I opened my hands to see my guardian undamaged-well, unchanged. It lay still. I set it on the ground, and spent the longest time just staring, willing it to move, and despairing in how its bright eyes had lost their glamour. After the sun had set, the nights chill drove me sadly away, with only a small burial mound as a monument to what had happened. I’ve returned many times to that place, wandering in the forest hoping the chance upon the great relics hidden in the wood, or simply waiting amongst the white sentinels. But the forest seems to turn me back, and no guide comes to show me the way.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Letting Go

All of my life has been a constant fight with my family. Over nothing but nonsense. Sometimes its me starting it, because they come and annoy me when I am clearly doing something else. It might be because of my short temper, but they know me well enough not to do it. It starts off with me and my mom talking. Then my temper starts to take over. My step-dad a person who I thought was my enemy. The only enemy here is myself. He would come down and take over the situation, because he didn't like how it was sounding. That really pisses me off. I realize now that he was only trying to help me, but always went about doing it in the wrong way. Sometimes the fights get so bad. My brother starts crying, then I go and try to comfort him. Not the best time to do, since I am the one that made him cry, and I'm still upset. I don't like to hurt the people that love me, and are just trying to help me. I took my family for granted. Having a life changing experience really turned my life around. I am very greatful for that experience. I love my family, I try not to do things that hurt them. All I want to do is be the best daughter, friend that I can be to them. Its time for me to return the favor.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Where's the Respect?

My junior year I decided to take Anatomy and Physiology instead of Chemistry. I thought I would put it off until my senior year, so I would have an easier class to look forward too. Not too much homework.
The first day of school didn't start out too well. The day prior I had gotten a molar extracted and it went terribly wrong. I go to my first three classes and they seem alright and the kids in the classes weren't too bad. Then Came 4th period.
I walk into class 3 minutes late with a peanut butter and jelly. The kind of peanut butter and jelly that had the perfect amount of peanut butter. Not too much, not to little, spread out evenly on one side of the white bread. And the jelly, was grape. The best kind of jelly to put with peanut butter. Grape jelly isn't like strawberry or raspberry where you get the seeds stuck in your teeth and then it takes hours to get all the little seeds hiding in your teeth out. The kids in the class were decent. All juniors, so of course I felt superior since I am a senior. Mr. Falcone gave us an activity to do, and I unconsciously put the tempting and magnificent peanut butter and jelly down. Next thing I know, Some Junior, Whom I have never met before, is eating my peanut butter and jelly. He knows that its mine and yet still proceeds to eat it. I wasn't mad, more aggravated and confused.
Now everyday that I come into 4th period, he is always asking me for some of my food and if its not asking then he's helping himself to it. Within the last week, we have gotten to know each other and now I don't mind as much, but where's the respect?

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Grammar Fun

Here are links to some of my favorite grammar websites:
“Guide to Grammar and Writing”
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/
Look for topics in Word and Sentence Level

“Online Writing Lab at Purdue University”
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/grammar/index.html
Look for topics in the Purdue University Online Writing Lab

“Strunk & White” on-line
http://www.bartleby.com/141/index.html

"Hamilton College Writing Center"
http://www.hamilton.edu/writing/index.html

Enjoy!

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

U.S. News and World Report, in an effort to stay relevant, likes to rate things. Given our current obsession with education, namely paying and preparing for it, colleges and high schools are an easy target. Normal people would be happy to have their school receive the ambiguously defined “silver medal,” but in Hanover it’s apparently cause for criticism.

According to Hanover’s resident pack of fools, our success as a school is determined by the fact that we’re all apparently very rich. Yes, that’s absolutely it: our parents all gave us the best brains that money can buy.

True, we’re not your average town, but we’re not all future Fortune-500 CEOs. It’s a little irritating to hear that I only have good grades because of my parents’ jobs, but I can’t imagine how much worse this is for the teachers.

I’ve had a fair sampling of public schools, and I have to say that the teachers at Hanover High are far better than the teachers at my past schools. However, by insinuating that Hanover’s success is due to its wealth, these people have bashed our teachers. Would Mr. Bonfiglio or Mr. Hackman be worse teachers if their students’ parents were maids or mechanics?

It’s a mark of how twisted our society is that while we’re the most affluent country in history, we’re still hypocritical enough to believe that we’re edgy and cool by railing on the successful. Rent, a musical glorifying the starving artist and deriding everything done for profit, is a multi-million dollar franchise that’s had its logo plastered on every conceivable piece of merchandise.

Maybe it's just the American way; we root, for Seabiscuit while in reality we’re War Admiral.

Monday, December 17, 2007

Chrismahanukwanzakkuh: The Holiday of Holidays (for the stores)

I walked into Dunkin' Donuts this morning to buy the same thing I always get: A #1 meal, with a large hot cocoa and two Sprinkles donuts, coated in sprinkles with every color of the rainbow. Instead, I received two Sprinkles donuts coated in sprinkles with two colors of the rainbow: red and green. I don't mind either color, in fact, red is usually my favorite color. It was the circumstance that pissed me off.

A few minutes later, I turned on the radio, and was greeted by "and a Happy Holidays to you," at the end of and ad. I turned my hot cocoa mug in my hand, and realized that under the classic "America Runs On Dunkin'," there was another well known phrase, that apparently no company has a copyright on: "Happy Holidays." I almost threw my cocoa away right then.

I am not Ebenezer Scrooge. I do enjoy Christmas. I enjoy Thanksgiving. I may not celebrate Hanukkah, but I have nothing against those who do. What really makes me angry is the commercialization of “The Holidays.” They are called HOLIdays because they are supposed to be holy. Christmas, Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Kwanza, and some of the newer ones, Chrismukkah, or Chrismahanukwanzakkuh, are not meant to be commercial hay days. If the commercial industry wants an excuse to have big sales on everything in stock, which sometimes aren’t even sales, just mark downs on prices after they’ve been marked up, then the industry can have mallidays. Just as the holidays are graciously scattered throughout the year, so can these days be. What I dislike is over a month straight of too much red and green, too much money being spent, even when people think they are saving, too much commercial holiday. The holidays are meant to be a time for family and friends, not to be taken advantage of.

I am quite outspoken about this. I even posted a rather inappropriate post on Facebook (http://hs.facebook.com/event.php?eid=6241268450 for those of you brave enough to face my wrath), ranting about extraneous Christian traditions, many of which are not even Christian, just stolen from pagan religions. A few hours later, a religious teenager from South Carolina messaged me, asking me to describe my anger, so that we could discuss it. I basically told her what I’ve written up above. She came back with a decent argument, that went something like this: “I agree completely, the holiday is way over-publicized. However, this publicity could be God’s way of converting more people. If a non-believer receives, say, a new iPod for Christmas, maybe she will think about why Christmas happens, and start going to church.”

I can accept that as a possible rebuttal. Speaking as a non-believing Christian (figure that one out), it is not the commercial industry’s job to convert people to religion. And also, many people are introduced to religion, like myself, and then choose not to believe, because of many reasons. And if we have chosen not to believe, a new iPod has very little chance of making us believe again, especially as we get old enough to understand that Christmas gifts are no miracle, just our parents being really nice to us.

I think that the commercial industry should back off on Christmas. I have no problem with them making a few sales around the right time, and even hanging some “Happy Holidays” signs up a few days before Christmas. But taking advantage of customers for a full month in advance, and reminding us the holidays are coming so many times that by the time they do arrive, we’re already sick of them, that I have a problem with. Of course, as annoyed as I am at the big stores, and some of the little ones, I also see myself as a bit of a hypocrite. The only reason I add “Christian” onto non-believing is to take advantage of the plentiful holidays.

MERRY CHRISMAHANUKWANZAKKUH, AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

The Senior Class

Last week in Common Ground we all received a nice letter from our Principal remarking at how wonderful the senior class is. While we all appreciated the letter and the sentiment, the rest of our Common Ground was open season for hating on the seniors. Even some of the seniors were getting in on it. The main argument, it seemed, was that the seniors this year aren't really seniors at all. We don't push people around, we aren't big and scary like seniors past, we're basically old juniors who are still in the school. 
Maybe it's the college woes or the new school that's got us down, but this years senior class is, quite frankly, lame. I have to admit it, we just aren't that strong of a class. Take us individually and we seem amazing. We have contortionists, scholars, nationally ranked athletes and even a few actors. But together, we're just a big group of people. If you ask a senior about that girl in our class who just got into Yale, the common answer is: "Who is that? Is she even in our grade?" No one takes the time to go out of their social holes and really figure each other out. Ever since 8th grade the only common theme I can see in my own class is that we're all in a rush to get out of Hanover, and in the process all we've done is alienate ourselves from one another. We have, arguably, the most cliquey grade in the school, yet we are supposed to be the most mature out of the entire student body. The only time people unite is when they rally to exclude other people, be it from their tables in the atrium or saving chairs in the auditorium or even not picking up their phones when certain people call. I've been there, I've seen all of this happen. Everyone is so exclusive and in their own worlds. The very same people who whine about wanting to go to college so badly do things that are, honestly, really "high school". John Hughes would have had a field day with the 08's at Hanover. When we aren't inebriated we just talk about getting inebriated or complain about some aspect of life in the Upper Valley. I say we because I have to include myself in this assessment, I am just as guilty as the rest. Sure, on the first day of school we all wore those red shirts. But if you stopped and looked at where everyone was sitting and who they were actually talking to, was it really different? What should have been a fun rallying point turned out to be a glorified uniform. 
I guess what I really want to say to the 08's is that we should spend our last year together really making something of it. Haze freshman, rather than each other. Let's actually get some ideas going for a sweet senior prank or something. Too long we've been defined as the grade that's too big. We need to make a name for ourselves. The 07's were the jocks, the 06's were alternative, the 05's legends. What are we? No one wants to be known as that grade that couldn't stand each other. So next time someone you don't know is looking for a seat in the auditorium or the next time you see someone sitting alone in the atrium, give them a chair. They're in your class, they're going through the same thing you are, why not get to know them, after all, we only have one more year.