Winter is the worst season

Winter is, by far, the worst season. I detest winter with a burning passion. It is by far the worst season. If this hasn't come across yet, I hate winter. It is just way too cold. You walk outside and then spend every moment of being outside wishing you were inside. You get runny noses, cold hands, and dry skin. Sure, you can do things like skiing, but let's be honest, everything else kind of sucks. In seasons such as summer you can do all sorts of things, such as boating, water skiing, and laying out in the sun. There are infinitely more things to do in summer than in winter, and you can do these things in a pleasant and enjoyable environment that is not conducive to illness. I don't think I have ever gone through a single winter season without getting sick in some way. This often includes multiple colds, and at least one illness that is more severe. In the summer, however, I rarely get sick. Finally, imagine this scenario: waking up to warmth and sunshine, going outside and seeing blue sky and green grass, and then making your way down to the local lake for a swim, before going to have a nice picnic. Now imagine this scenario: waking up in a freezing cold home, dressing in approximately 13.4 layers of clothing, running to your car to go to school that will take 27 minutes to actually warm up, and then spending the rest of your day avoiding going outside because it is too cold. Which scenario sounds better to you?

Calculus Kinda Sucks

This was a complaint about calculus, but I've realized it's just a hard class and not specifically the teacher's fault. It's past college applications time, so I'm a lot less stressed. I don't really know what to write about now, but I'm just generally more relaxed and kind of done with the overly stressed out peers. I think people just need to take a moment to realize things are going to be fine.

LOUD NOISES

Dear Person who fires off a cannon in the middle of the night,
why do you fire a cannon in the middle of the night? Now, what happens probably isn't a cannon but something else. However, whenever I try to sleep at night something really loud goes bang in the middle of the night. I have no idea what it is. Sometimes it's loud and sudden, and other times it sounds like fireworks going off in the distance. In the end could you just stop creating loud noises in the night because people are trying to sleep and your sounds are making people wonder what they just heard.
Sincerely,
Person who hollers on top of his roof in the middle of the night

Creating God in our Image

While watching a video on the analysis of the core philosophy behind the show, Mr. Robot, I happened upon an interesting thesis posed by Ledwig Feuerbach, an atheist philosopher of the 19th century whose work influenced that of Karl Marx. Feuerbach suggests that we created God and imbued him with our highest principles: love, justice, wisdom, etc. But over time we as a species forgot that we created God; we then looked at him and thought we are so similar to God that he must have created US in HIS image, therefore, inverting our original relationship with him. I found this to be a very interesting theory because looking at God from the perspective of a religious practitioner, one can see a being with qualities so supreme they are unattainable by the common man. God has infinite knowledge, an unbending sense of justice, and wholehearted love for all his children. But like Man, God has also been shown to be jealous, wrathful, and even vengeful. In this light, God represents the ideal state of Man with his inevitable conditions instead of Man as an offshoot of God.

Advance Transit Rant

The Advance Transit is the bane of my existence.

Every morning when I park in Thompson, I have to deal with this wretched invention. The bus idles in front of the few parking spots I am allowed to park in with my Town of Hanover pass, forcing me  to park further away from the entrance in less convenient spots. If I am lucky enough to avoid the AT in the morning and get a good spot, when I want to leave in the afternoon, the AT is almost always planted in front of my spot. When I let the driver know that I'm blocked in, he doesn't leave for 3 more minutes or so, "waiting" for any more passengers who might get on the shuttle. Seriously, how many Dartmouth employees are trying to get from the Thompson parking lot into town at 2 in the afternoon? Are there so many people who use this service that the shuttle needs to run every five minutes, making it nearly impossible for me to avoid?

And even if I don't encounter the AT when I am trying to park, the AT drives slowly throughout town, causing significant delays and traffic jams. Just this morning the AT stopped to let someone off a few feet beyond the RMS drop-off intersection, causing a traffic jam and forcing all cars and students trying to cross the street to wait 30 seconds at a standstill as the passenger got off.

Why, Advance Transit management, do you put your stops right off of busy intersections? Or why do you have a shuttle that runs every 5 minutes throughout the work day and parks right in front of parking spots that people need to use? I think that as much as the AT helps people, it also harms people, and I would like to see reform in the AT system to remedy some of these problems.

An Ode to Coop Chicken and Fries

Dear Coop Chicken and Fries,

You are the love of my life, the apple of my eye. When I am feeling down, I know you will always be there to pick me up. Had a rough Calculus test? You'll be there; I know from experience. Your warm, crispy texture brightens my day and soothes any ailments, both emotional and physical. I might even have an addiction to you. Earlier this afternoon I walked to the Coop, repeating to myself the whole way the mantra, "I will not get Coop chicken. I will eat healthy today." But when I walked by you, let's just say that was my fatal flaw. You were fresh out of the kitchen, gleaming in the heat lamps, just waiting to be eaten. It was before the usual lunch rush and you remained relatively untainted, privy to my eyes only. Seeing the beautifully crispy exterior, I was unable to walk away. I ordered an entire box, saying to the person behind the counter "Fill 'er to the brim" (actual quote). I may have spent eight dollars, but it was all worth it. I believe that almost any problem can be solved via Barbecue chicken and french fries. I am left so satisfied after eating my meal: there truly is not better way to spend my lunch money. You, Coop chicken and french fries, have been instrumental in my emotional well-being throughout the past three and a half years. Truth be told, saying goodbye to you might be the hardest part of going to college.

Yours truly, Atticus

Why Fall is the Best Season

Fall is the best season of the year; although, its competition consists of a season where everything is dead, a season where everything is wet all the time, and a season turns lots of people into walking cherries--swollen red faces suspended on long reedy stalks. Fall has no downsides. The weather is always perfect, just cold enough for you to wear a sweater, but not cold enough for a down jacket. The trees are undergoing a metamorphosis from sticky, vibrant-green to the mellow colors of yellow, orange, and red. Fall just inspires a sort of stillness of the soul, the combination of both cool weather and warm yet colors creates a surrounding environment too calm to be upset. Sure I can go inside and be as upset as I want, but as soon as I step outside I just want to walk around and enjoy the day. I also love the crinkle of dead leaves like an incessant reminder of my own mortality--how I should do what I love and work hard for the benefit of the world. I’m only here for a short while so why not get the most out of it. That is why fall is perfect because it lures my thoughts away from the stresses of school and the overall drama of life to the beauty and peace of nature, which sadly might not be around by the end of my days. Looks like I’m getting a little angry and political, guess I should go take a walk.

Dear Johnny Cash

Dear Johnny Cash,

You have been my idol for most of my life. I’ve always been in love with country music, but you are the founder. There is a legend for every genre, Michael Jackson for pop music, Ella Fitzgerald for jazz, John Mayer for singer songwriter… you are the king of country. Your wonderful genre has developed and changed so much throughout the years, but every once in awhile i’ll hear a new artist that reminds me of you. I went to see your museum in Nashville last year and it was a truly memorable experience. You live on in everyone's memories through your music, image, and love for June. Your image of the man in black and all you stand for shows how passionate you were about the problems in society. You always wore black to remind people that there are still bad things happening in the world and you swore ti never wear a suit of white till the world was a better place. If you were still around i'm sure you sadly would still be wearing black. Your love for June Carter was so strong in your music that it has lived on through the years and there are still many references to "a love like Johnny and June" in so many songs. I wish I could have met you! I think we would have gotten alone.

~Iva

War Against Celery

Dear Celery,
I hate celery. The flavor from it is bitter and for me ruins my meals. Now I'm okay with having celery on the side of a dish since I can just set it aside and not eat it. What I hate is when something has celery imbedded inside of it. For example, shredded tuna the stuff you find inside a tuna fish sandwich. Tuna tastes perfectly fine, but then someone decided to put celery inside of it completely ruining it. Whenever I get a tuna fish sandwich I have to pick out all the tiny bits of celery out in order to eat the sandwich. Apparently celery was put inside to give it more of a crunch but that's stupid. It becomes a big pain to pick through the tuna and take out all of the celery. I don't go out and eat that much but whenever I go somewhere the chances of the tuna having celery inside of it is high. The only exception would Subway. What other thing do people needlessly put celery in?

How I Acquired my New Orange Water Bottle

At the end of my Dartmouth class last Tuesday, everyone was packing up and leaving the classroom. I saw an orange Nalgene bottle sitting on the ground by one of the chairs, and I remembered who had been sitting there that day, so I thought I would just run out and bring the girl her water bottle. But when I left the room, I didn't see the girl anywhere. I contemplated bringing it back to the classroom and leaving it with the professor, but then I was worried how weird it would look to show back up in the classroom to drop off the water bottle just five minutes after class ended. So it seemed that my only option was to bring the water bottle home with me and bring it back to class on Thursday.

I started walking to my car. I felt very odd carrying this random girl's water bottle, and I hoped she wouldn't see me from afar and think that I stole her water bottle. I kept looking around for the chance that I might see her walking around. It was a really hot day though, and as I was walking I got so thirsty and tired and I couldn't help myself, so I drank out of the water bottle.

When I got home I felt very odd about having this random girl's water bottle (which now had less water in it then when I took it from the classroom) and about drinking from this random girl's water bottle. And then I thought how weird it would be when I showed up on Thursday and said "Hi, I took your water bottle home and now here it is." I started to regret that I didn't just leave the water bottle in the classroom in the first place.

When Thursday rolled around, I brought the water bottle (which I had now emptied out) to class. It was sitting in my backpack for most of class, and I swear the girl was looking at it and probably thinking that I stole her water bottle. At the end of the class as she was leaving I knew I had to say something, so I called out to her and asked her if it was her water bottle. Now, this girl has previously told me that she is from Orange County, so you can imagine the tone in which she then responded "Uh, no?" and gave me a look like I had two heads.

I then found myself in the same conundrum: what do I do with this stupid water bottle?! I decided to just set it down in the classroom and started to walk away, but then I felt odd that my professor had seen me leave this random object in her classroom. So finally I just took the water bottle home with me.

And now I have a new Orange Nalgene water bottle.